Saint Alcohol Elf Day

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Saint Patrick’s Day is a holiday full of traditions!
Such as painting your neighbor’s ham hocks green to ensure a bountiful gravy harvest, leaving all of your dad’s brain cream at the base of a rainbow, and getting blind drunk at church. One tradition that’s often overlooked, from the ancient Irishmen of Japan, is the story of the Alcohol Elf. These rascals would sneak into homes under the cover of darkness and force you to wash their cuddle joints. If you refused, you’d catch an enchanted fist to the dome. Either way, they made you drink malt liquor the whole time!
This shirt celebrates that often forgotten tradition, which we hope to forget again as soon as possible.